My whole life I have pretty much done what I wanted to do
and have never really cared to much about what people thought about it. I have
of course had my moments, I am only human, but all in all up to this point “I did it my way” (Thanks Frank) and I have very few
regrets. I remember getting my first tattoo when I was 17 making my mom cry and
at 37 I just started my 11th tattoo, a ¾ sleeve in a pseudo Maori
design, and she laughed to hold back the tears. She has come to accept who I am
and I will always be her little boy but with each new tattoo or piercing I give
her a little shock. (Though the only piercing I still wear regularly are my 4 gauge
titanium nipple rings which I got at 18.)
Even though I have always wanted a family and kids (I have
an amazingly hot wife and 3 awesome kids with dynamite personalities) I have
never in my life wanted to be domesticated. I don’t want to do the plaid shorts
and golf thing. I would rather be building something than watching football. I
go to my little girl’s school events and I see so many fathers who have given
up and have let their spirits die, allowing themselves to be absorbed into the
collective consciousness that is the modern society of consumption. Big TV’s and
bigger cars, flavored with pumpkin lattes and life divided up into sports seasons,
the mundane only being broken up by the occasional glimpse of something that
stokes what little flame they have left, reminding them of the old dreams that
still reside deep inside them.
I guess I am writing this for a couple of reasons. The first being
I know a lot of people on both sides of the spectrum, the ones who struggle to
live and the ones who run free like the Mustangs of the American frontier. The second is I hear so many people talking about
life running by and I hear tons of regret. Ultimately there must be balance in
life, especially when you have to raise a family and you have responsibilities
but I urge everyone to live the dreams they want to live. Wars are made up of
many small battles. Life is a struggle and we cannot all run free, but you can
indeed have the little things, the little victories that give you your little
piece of the pie. Never forget the stubborn arrogance of youth that gave you
the strength to jump tall buildings in a single bound and keep trying even when
you slammed yourself against the wall time and time again.
I am many things. A father, a husband, a martial arts
instructor, a firefighter, a backyard builder, an artist, a writer, a dreamer,
but most of all I am an achiever. Some victories are smaller than others for
sure, but there is no doubt (judging by the reactions I get from people) I am
doing what I want and it feels good to know I haven’t been absorbed into the
system and domesticated. It starts small, get that tattoo, start that project
you have always wanted to start, save for that trip you always wanted to go on.
I don’t care what it is but damn it do something to stoke the fire inside, to
light the way for your dreams to come true. Even if it’s just a small one, it
all starts with a step. I know what it’s like to struggle for a dream,
it took me 3 ½ years to build a rat bike. I have to balance a family and multiple jobs
just like everybody else, but it is possible. Live your life with no regret and
do it now because we are not promised tomorrow. Now go forth and live those
dreams and make shit happen.
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